That a man comes up and tells you his past does not
mean you must marry him.
What if God has not called you into the relationship
life the man is offering and remember God said ‘as many as he called ...' what
if you were not called to marry a poor man but went ahead to marry a poor man
in the name of love, you may feel frustrated all your life. As much as I don't
want to make a general statement, it is point knowing that when a fiancé or fiancée
opens up to you; it is not a show of love to still go to the altar with the
person if you think or perceive you can't live with the person past. If you
decide to call marriage quit you have done no wrong and if you wish to continue
you are not more righteous either. That you believe the person was God sent and
ordain before the present truth you now know does not mean that if you call
marriage quit you are a sinner or you never really love the person.
Remember some love hold on while some love let go.
You must make calculated and thoughtful risk in
marriage and not just single moment decision or because others have this particular
challenges and got marry and people praised them for their love, you too want
to marry your partner despite her challenges in order to get the appreciation
of people, remember people appreciation does not sustain a marriage it is the
two of you that will be married together (remember Ananias and sapphire they
both died because of seeking people applauds). Marrying someone with a past is
not the issue but surrender your life to years of woes just because someone was
true to you and the ignorant thinking of what if my future spouse has not open
up we will still have being married. Your future spouse owes you the duty into
their past that could possibly have an enduring impact into your wedding; that
you future spouse did not inform you does not mean it is right. Marrying to
prove you love or that your love is strong-deep is also unnecessary. We don’t marry
to prove a point we marry to achieve what we can’t achieve alone and not to
brag to others that you have now changed your status from single to married. Marriage
is a relationship for a life time and though there is no perfect person without
a past still you must be a risk manager and know the extent you can go. If you
desire children why marry a lady without womb to show her love. That you marry
a lady with womb does not even guarantee you will have biological children but
with a woman without womb the risk of not having children is higher. I know of
miraculous delivery but why take a risk except of course it was the abortion
she did for you that led to her losing her womb. Though womb loss could come
through different means and complications but the popular mean is abortion. You
owe your fiancé or fiancée to keep the secrets but not a debt of marrying them
and that you have shared your secrets to eleven man and they left you does not
mean you should lie to the twelfth man; he may just be the person that is ready
to take you with your past and your keeping of the truth may really affect his
trust for you which is a silence killer of love.
What about emotional management of situation and
information. Sometimes when we lose opportunities all we can ask for his
forgiveness and not the lost opportunities. Every sinner was once a saint and
everybody has a past.